I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize