There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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