So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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