lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
