I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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