So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
