I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
