I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
