the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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