Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
