its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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