Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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