I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
