We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize