He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
