thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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