Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
