Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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