It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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