just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
