where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
