If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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