'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
