So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Randomize
