I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
