If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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