super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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