he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
