she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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