Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
