Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
