Where did you get a picture of my penis
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
