If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Shitshow foam night was such a success
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
