A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
