i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
