I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Don't EVER smell your tampon
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Randomize