You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
sex in a hospital.. check
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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