You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Mom said you looked used
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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