if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
