I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize