is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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