Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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