You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
