So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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