I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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