if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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