he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
