just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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