The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
