She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
