you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
